Becoming a new creature

I discovered I was actually fearful of God changing me into a different person, as much as I said I wanted that and didn’t like so many of the things about myself. I think I was fearful that I wouldn’t know how to be that person, because I’ve never been well adjusted and happy before. I’ve always been a griper and complainer. What else would I do? Then I thought, “God has been so effective at getting me things I need when I’ve been willing to take the next indicated step and follow His will, I’ll bet there’s a way to fix this.” I think the fixing involves the fact that I’m starting to feel more like an adult, and not a kid imposter. That’s in large part because I’m starting to have adult attitudes and actions, instead of running away from everything. Instead of having to fake self-esteem, I’m starting to get it, not from some training meant to manufacture it, but from actually being a better person. There’s power from God to accept the new person I’m becoming.